So apparently the standard of measure for respecting families is hiring fathers, mothers, and children. Is this the first step in conservatives trying to do away with child labor regulations? “He’s pro-family, he wants to hire kids so they can help their families earn money and gain valuable work experience for the…

Does anyone know what the record for lawsuits brought against a sitting president is? I want to know the exact moment Trump shatters it.

O’Reilly is the kind of person who blames everyone else for his own failings. So this will be the fault of some liberal feminazi conspiracy to smear the good name of a bastion of conservative thought, family values, and moral uprightness

Unlike this guy, I have a perfectly legitimate reason for not dating hot women. I lack the confidence and self esteem to believe that any women would ever find me attractive under any circumstance, and therefore pre-reject myself for any possible romantic overtures.

I know it won’t happen, but man would it be great if FOX News got sued into bankruptcy and its on screen personalities were relegated to the dust bin of history.

The name is also confusing, and I say that as a fan of the anime. At face value it sounds like a supernatural/horror kind of thing, but instead you’re watching sci-fi anti-terrorism hackers with prosthetic bodies. I can see how that would be off-putting to people unfamiliar with the source material.

I will never stop being glad that I moved out of Utah when I graduated high school.

Gotta watch out for them gay voodoo dolls, too. They’ll grab some of your pubic hairs, tie them to the doll, and then play non-stop show tunes and Liberace. Before you know it, you’re wearing sequins and singing Oklahoma while you set up your Grindr account!

You obviously don’t know how sex works. See, if a man is in close proximity to a woman who is not his wife and he is alone, then some dangerous things start happening. First, the woman’s vagina starts emitting pheromones designed to activate the Devil Center of the man’s brain. The Devil Center picks up on these…

To: Daily Mail

Why would I want Tinder on my PC? My PC is for escaping my crushing social ineptitude and loneliness, not being reminded of it. That’s what my phone is for. Sheesh people, do a little market research here. Gawd!

With totally bitchin’ parties and field trips and shit that’ll make the straight Christian kids jealous that they can’t join.

Well clearly women should marry wealthy men if they want support for the child once it’s forced out of their Satan bits. That’s what they get for luring men to put their Angel Sticks into women’s Demon Tunnels.

He’s worthless, but I doubt he knows it. He and his ilk at too fucking stupid to recognize their own uselessness.

First go after the people who take a shit and manage to get it everywhere except in the bowl. Then go after the seat pissers.

Lately I like polyp. It already sounds appropriately gross, and you can add a lot of adjectives to make it worse. Festering polyp, oozing polyp, cancerous polyp. It’s a great, multi-faceted insult.

“I would never walk up to you and say those words to you...”

This is the kind of vocabulary that you can only get from an ivy league education. These are the best words that he bragged about knowing.

I love how he looks so delighted by the whole thing.

So, basically, this woman hates movies