nooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooone giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiives a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

Hey, a space buggy, that’s cool. I still have my NMS disc in my ps4... Ooh, but hey, look at the time, I gotta get back to Horizon zero dawn right now soooo...

freedom of speech sometimes comes with consequences, my good bitch.

I understand what you are saying, but I’d imagine that to a black person, a white guy waving the Confederate flag is a message of “I wish that you black people were once again property of white people.”

This subject came up during dinner recently with my rather fancy aunt and uncle at my uncle’s very posh NY club. The consensus was that trump couldn’t find a club that would have him so he made his own, ditto with co-op buildings (hence the brown dildo in midtown). None of us could imagine why anyone else would join…

Oh man... I thought that was going in a completely different direction

Ohhh, the Bureau of Land Management! Phew!

Its pronounced Bouquet!

My niece’s team was one of the winners last year and got to go to the WH and meet Obama. Recently she told me how happy she was that they won last year because 1) she’d never want to meet trump, and 2) she wasn’t sure he would even host the science fair winners since he hates science.

And all these intelligent children patiently explaining, over and over, how the baking soda volcano works.

THIS FUCKING WOMAN IS THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE DEPORTED NOT GUADALUPE.

Quimby: Also it has been brought to my attention that a number of you are stroking guns...

I was sympathetic until he blamed “feminists” as some kind of boogeyman.

AWESOME

One of my co-workers, a 65ish year old black man, got “nigger” dropped on him outside the county court house (we are lawyers) by random passerby. He smacked the guy over the head with an umbrella. Seemed appropriate to me.

It’s European beer and therefore sold in metric six-packs.

Someone at the DMV obviously does not agree with the Mercator projection map.