Only if they draft a PowerPoint to run the offense.

I'm going to need to see a ranking of Cialis bathtubs next.

Well, once the rival school district put their football team on a monster truck, we knew there'd be escalation.

Energon, yo.

Greg Monroe has been training for this spot, but so far has only mastered number 1.

No matter his success, he'll never be Germany's Das Wunderkind - that role is reserved forever for Alex Wright.

Last time that guy ever trusts the guy in motion.

Cue speculation that the AP thing is an elaborate scheme to get him to Dallas, with dropped charges the minute the paperwork is processed. Because, chemtrails.

It's a resilient team - they'll be looking for the next man up.

Sorry. I'm not home right now - I'm walking in the spiderwebs.

Ever notice that the opening blast of "Stronger" basically paved the way for every movie trailer this side of Inception? Trend-setter, that girl.

I would like to also point out that there's no shame in following use of the f-word: "Fucking magnets. How do they work?"

THIS IS THE PART IN WHICH DAN SNYDER STEPS IN TO SAVE THE DAY.

"Utah is taken." - Keanu Reeves

San Diego Chicken clap.

I would say it's a good place to plant one's fanny, but that doesn't seem applicable any more.

Mendez, before his days as a pervert CO.

No one on the team is more adept at Magic: The Gathering.

Yeah, this.

There's something so weird about using the phrase "a match made in heaven" when you literally believe that heaven is an actual literal place. Full of dead people.