That’s an unfair potshot at Ottawa. It’s an amazing place to get a really good night’s sleep.

More proof that hockey doesn’t work in Canada.

As a party trick, I’m going to lick my finger and then touch this take.

I feel bad for the fan. I bet he was setting Joey up for a compliment and he was going to say “I remember when you used to be good...LAST YEAR! When you batted .326 with 29 home runs!” But Joey cut him off.

if it helps, I feel like a turd that I DO get the joke

According to his Twitter bio, Jon Buckley “...deliver(s) and sell(s) Red Bull...” so I’m going to have to side with him on this one.

I can’t think of a better place to take your sinking ship.

Good Kinja.

It’s probably LaVar Ball you idiot

Jar Jar Binks wakes up in his bedroom, turns to Suzanne Pleshette and says, “You-sa wont be believin’ the crazy dream meesa just had!”

Not only can you join them, you’ve just been named the starting pitcher for Friday.

Um, if it had nothing to do with the city, then why is the T-Rex short for Torontosauras Rex, idiot.

Yes, nothing says “I love you” like an implicit, threatening demand for reciprocity.

So...he has risen?

If that’s the series, I will root for San Andreas.

This GIF, with Erik Karlsson and Mike Green pairing off during a post-whistle scrum, reminds of a game in the 80s between the Oilers and the Canadiens, in which a bench-clearing brawl erupted, and both teams spilled on the ice and raced towards each other. Harry Neale was calling the game with Bob Cole and exclaimed…

I would just like to point out some things: