Red cabbage is better than green for slaw, and grated carrots are fine.

This is a weird headline because as long as there is anyone on the payroll of USA Gymnastics who was there under Larry Nassar, there will always be a “highest-ranking holdover from the Larry Nassar era,” even if it’s, like, a janitor.

Your mom and monster dongs

Exit control will never work. The only thing that can stop a bad guy with an exit is a good guy with an exit.

Artist’s rendering of the right wing:

My wife kept her name, and we gave our son her last name as a middle name. I don’t know if we would give a second child the same middle name, maybe we would reach back for another family name.

HE WAS A RANK AMATEUR COMPARED TO DR. COLOSSUS

He only felt safe spitting in the face of the drunken wifebeating Klansmen who paved the way for him because of the DH.

The song about a transgender vampire Al Pacino in the Godfather 2 is so much more important to human progress than some stupid private space shuttle for rich dickheads.

The first season was good because watching the development of all the other good, funny characters was enough to paper over how annoying Andy Samberg is.

They’re not booing, they’re saying Puuuuuuuuu-holes

I hope Trump throws your asses in prison for making this video autoplay.

Can I ask what you all are buying so much of that makes a Prime membership worth it? I only use Amazon at Christmas because my relatives put their wishlists up. Last year I signed up for the Prime membership for the free shipping in December and cancelled in January to get my refund.

Can I ask what you all are buying so much of that makes a Prime membership worth it? I only use Amazon at Christmas…

If you marry a grown man who plays video games, you get what you deserve.

Scrape it into rails and snort it. Unless you’re a coward.

Scrape it into rails and snort it. Unless you’re a coward.

BENGHAZI II

He’s like a Ken doll, but with less screen presence.

Dude, god bless you. Thank you for learning these ijits what’s what.

You can never be in before “unions are amazing.” I say that every morning when I go to my job and earn what I’m worth.