There's a difference between goddamned Mad Dog McCree or the original Splatterhouse and Grand Theft Auto V, William. Any able-minded human being can see that.

I'm nowhere near sheltered. I grew up in a trailer park. My father was in the KKK (which of course I do not condone) and both my parents worked in factories my entire life. I've been to Afghanistan. I've watched people die. I've dealt with a LOT of shit outside of all of that. So don't tell me about sheltered and I…

No, you actually did, you had lazy-ass parents that didn't bother to look up game ratings and bought you games you shouldn't have been bought. And no, they didn't turn you into a murderer, and porn doesn't make you a rapist either but I wouldn't buy a 12-year-old a copy of Big Bootied Shit-Eating Cumsluts 4 either.

No, you actually did, you just weren't affected by it. It's a fucking mature-rated game and no one should have bought it for you.

Hold up your thumbs when you do it so that you cover the left and right screens and can only see the center screen. It helps.

So... being mean to people doesn't work. It makes them hate you.

Calling it now: 2076 Game of the Year.

The silly thing is, regardless of all the sensationalism bawwing in here, elderly drivers have killed more people than gamers, but nobody seems to give a shit about that. This story is a prime example of why the former should be paid a hell of a lot more attention to than the latter.

The fuck is wrong with you? What would you prefer they post on their own site you don't pay to access?

I was trying to air my apartment out, there was a leak and I had black mold growing in the wall. If it's any consolation, the mold made me sick later.

The Armed Forces outlaws private pornography usage, alcohol, and consensual sex, forces everyone to live together in cramped quarters for months at a time and take showers together, and then wonders why rape is through the roof. Fucking morons.

HAHAHA, if you're going into the Armed Forces, this is only the tip of the iceberg concerning "pointless crap". Jesus God, do YOU ever have a surprise coming.

This explains so much of Cartoon Network.

Jesus Christ, I laughed myself into a coughing fit

The graphics run fine, but the sound stutters continously — so bad it makes the frame rate flicker. Seriously, every little noise and echo is like DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. FtFtFtFtFtFtFtFtFt. God forbid I get near water, it sounds like a lake having a seizure. Not only that, but every button press…

MTV + "Jerry Bruckheimer Games" sounds like it would have resulted in the most boring, broken, explodey, unmusical abortion we've ever seen. Like a generic Gears of War but with arguing and awkward screwing.

Yeah, I've been trying to play Minecraft on PC since alpha, but since it's in Java it won't run worth a shit on Intel integrated graphics cards. I'd play the smoother-running version on Xbox but I can't find anybody there to play with so I quit giving a crap about the game a year ago anyway. Cest la vie.

Am I the only one that thinks the guy in the article picture looks like dammit? That kid needs some sun and a toothbrush. And maybe some vitamin C.

This set-up might be able to actually get me back into Minecraft — providing I had a computer that could run it and the money to buy such a computer.

> Turned out I was anemic