As a Dad, this really bothers me on a visceral level. Who WOULDN’T want to spend time with your kid?!? He’s YOUR KID. This will definitely impact them since “Dad doesn’t seem to care” which in turn will influence their parenting style which perpetuates this indifference.

He’s a boorish, barely-literate, misogynistic, cheese-brained old racist who managed to convince 62 million people that he was fit to be President.

“...or for you to consider delivering your State of the Union address in writing to the Congress on January 29...”

Maybe they can release it on the same weekend as the Top Gun sequel for maximum stupidity.

“I couldn’t control you,”

I love the guy, every time I see his picture posted on a story on one of the Giz sites, I invariably think to myself “Goddamn I’m aging well.” It’s a hollow high, sure, but you have to take your victories where you find them.

Has she seen DeNiro on SNL? Dude just cannot.

None of them deserves a refund.

Did she say “funnier” or “more homophobic”? Because that’s the only comparison to be made between the two. Comedy-wise, they ain’t even on the same level, even if you put two Kevin Harts under the same trench coat.

Have Cher host it. Or Obama. George Carlin’s ghost. 

the “my great great great great great grandmother was a cherokee princess” thing needs to fucking die already. Not only is it usually inaccurate, irrelevant to whether a person is actually native, and part of the “blood quantum” shit, it’s also only ever trotted out when someone is either trying to prove that they…

Impugning the good name of the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. 

The annual appearances of Doug Judy, along with the Halloween heist episodes, are perhaps the highlights of the show for me. But I think it might be best to limit him to that

And, you know, Donald Trump did not understand, in the end, that just because we were friends didn’t mean he wasn’t going to be subjected to the proper scrutiny.

Former Hill staffer here...

“You can ruin our reputation and our life with a few well-chosen words.”

Chip Gaines: “I was told there would be no math.”

Well, obviously he must have stolen the fob. /s