Up Next on Secrets of the Yeti. Do Yeti knit? [Commercial break] Previously on Secrets of the Yeti. Did the Yeti ever learn to knit? We have 3 experts weigh in on the matter. But first, Dr Jansen discusses the Yeti’s impact on local Nepalese tourism.

Dad fight! Dad fight, everyone!

I’m reminded of a story where a billionaire left New Jersey for Florida. Ouch. 

His ‘Bye Felicia’ was the best Bye Felicia.

You need to call the History channel and let them know that you’d watch the shit out of ‘Palin Patrol - with Todd and Sarah’. Then you’d have to make good on your promise. Mind you, you don’t have to watch it, just have the TV channel on that station.

So, Coors? Jeff Sessions is Coors.

The question is: Did he kiss the ring?

We need to quit legitimizing the Confederacy as a country. No other country recognized it as a nation (though I was granted belligerent status) and the Supreme Court stated the states never legally seceded. One of the things we can do is quit saying Jefferson Davis was a president of anything. Rather, say he was the…

So what percentage of the car would you say is already ‘designed’ by the government by the time you start?

Pedro had to take down all his signs for School President when he had Summer Wheatley Pinata’d. Just sayin’.

Arm yourself with facts:

This comment stinx.

We absolutely need to remember the terrible things we did to each other. Teaching the unvarnished history of slavery and the Jim Crow era is essential. We need to preserve the relics of the era and I even support Civil War reenactments, to an extent. But placing statues of these men on literal pedestals is not how to…

My selfie stick is only ‘water-resistant’. Will that work too?

And he has a normal sized Roladex being fumbled through by baby’s hands. All the while, he rattles off numbers. “Six, Six, eww Four, Nine.”

wedo

Oh, I know. My brother is blond and he was called ‘wedo’ growing up. It’s just society likes to squeeze people into to boxes.

I don’t know how to feel about this. I’m Hispanic. And I’ve an adopted daughter who’s blonde haired and blue eyed. She has my last name. Is she Hispanic? I kind of feel like Paris says she’s Black because that’s who her family is. Then I remember that scene from the Jerk. When Steve Martin said he was ‘born a poor…

one please!

I have. But I’ve never heard of Mexican Jet Packs.