I took an all-day First Aid class a couple of weeks ago and they totally skipped over the sexual assault option.

Indeed

Where does exercise fit in? I'm NOT (emphatically NOT) asking "So, what about weight loss? That's a change! Privilege logic win, whoo!" I'm asking if exercise/general fitness is considered part of the necessary care of the body. I'd assume so, but you know what they say about assuming. And I have the FAQ link…

13 bucks and a time machine and that red polka-dot number will be mine! ALL MINE!!

"They stretch foot-long wads of dough into at least 10 feet of slender, ribbonlike noodle by whipping the center out like a jump rope and rippling and swirling it through the air like the ribbons twirled by Olympic rhythmic gymnasts. Often, the dancer flings the dough over customers' heads as they squeal and clap,…

I kind of see where you're going, but I don't think "It's like alien goo" is necessarily racist. Now, if the comment had been "Damn, why does all Chinese food look like alien goo?" THAT would be racist.

HA! Awesome.

Only if God is real. Also? I've spent 20 minutes watching that .gif. It's like a perverse Bellagio fountain and it is magical.

So, WWB0TD then?

All I can manage is an angry "What the FUCK is WRONG with people???" I'm horrified and sad and angry, but mostly? Just baffled. Absolutely baffled by the deep well of WRONG from which this guy drinks.

Considering the evolution of "hygiene" products (don't get me started), that's totally accurate.

I like you.

"...god forbid any man, child, or small animal ever see you carrying the Object That Must Not Be Named in public."

Back in the days of step aerobics (shush, I'm old), I had a teacher actually stop in the middle of the routine and ask "Cat Rancher, are you OK? You're so red!" Yes, I am OK. I turn red if exercise in the cold, in the heat, on a boat with a goat. Move along.

ah, there's the picture

Ladies and gentlemen, allow Hugh Jackman to sum this one up for you:

Sidetrack, but when Lindy put this gif in the "Fuck This Week" article on Friday, I laughed to the point of tears and then did that stoner thing, where I'd randomly think of the .gif and start giggling again.

You can have all the grape jellybeans and whatever flavor the Barbie pink is supposed to be (hairspray? Regrets of Easters past?) and I'll take all the buttered popcorn and licorice, thank you.