He just oozes douchebag, doesn't he?

Isn't that pretty much the plot of Beetlejuice?

You should have faked up a Victorian headstone for a 10 year old called Helen - just to mess with her. Missed opportunity!

Oooh, I have recurring dreams of owning a house full of the furniture and clothes of the previous owners. But creepy dolls have never yet made an appearance. Not sleeping tonight!!

Imagine the logistics. You've already got your luggage plus what you've bought along the way.

Her kid sounds smart. Must have been the vaccines.

Someone I know got shingles on her eyes. You do not want that.

EVERYONE COME ROUND TO MINE FOR A SMALLPOX PARTY!

Your post gives me an excuse to leave this here - a classic piece of animal wrangling.

What did they do to cause the dudgeon?

Good for you!

And did you?

Or because it's what they think other women would like and apparently all women are borg.

I like that. It's at once romantic and businesslike!

She loves countdowns??

I can't believe she actually wanted to do that last one. That's my idea of torture.

Oh but think of the fun you could have had ...

Where's that cat carrying her kitten away?? We need her.

Ohh my god ...