Recently traded my Dyson to a coworker, as I’d really needed a cordless vacuum. It was this Tineco brand I’d never heard of. I thought maybe I got ripped-off, but turned out to be a great little vacuum!

It’s also sold at the grocery store next to the popcorn.

I highly recommend getting a bottle of the butter-flavored cocounut oil that’s sold next to the popcorn at the grocery store. Brought some to the Christmas potluck at work last year; almost nothing else was even touched, but damn if we didn’t go through 3 bags of that stuff!

According to the USDA, trichinosis has been eradicated, and they now recommend cooking pork chops to 135F in the center. Completely changed the way I look at pork chops; the increase in quality is immeasurable!

ETA: Same guy owns this car wash, as well. Might avoid reading if you’re in the slightest-way squeamish:

Had a customer who owned not one, but TWO mint-condition 1998 Chevy Trackers. They were both immaculate inside and out, and less than 40k miles each, to boot.

A “Machine Gun Kelly” is when you lick a famous person’s asshole, but secretly you’re jerking off to pictures of yourself.

Don’t get me wrong, MGK’s a douche, but I can’t remember him doing anything worse than tricking Megan Fox into dating him, which limits him to 3 Jezebel articles per day.

Let’s just cut through the bullshit; she’s young, pretty, and has more money than GOD. Just STFU about her “mental health;” that’s an insult to people with actual mental disorders.

If they really wanted to offend North Carolinians, they would have hacked the sign to say, “My Body, My Choice!” or “God Loves Fags!”

TBF, people love to shit on the Carolinas for being racist...but have you ever spoken to people in, say, Minnesota? Wisconsin? Michigan? Oregon? Washington? California? Colorado?

Worked especially well for tow-trucks, as you were in a hurry to get somebody to tow your car and would just call the first company you saw in the Yellow Pages. We still have A1 Towing, despite phone books going to way of the dodo.

There’s company called ServSafe that certifies food service workers to various degrees; they have “Food Handling” certification that doesn’t really mean anything, and then there’s “Manager” certification that delves much deeper into training employees with how to safely handle food.

This Chinese guy made a panel of physical buttons connected to the control unit port in his Tesla. You have buttons for pretty much every major function. This device completely defeats the purpose of minimalism. What do you think?

PLEASE DON’T GO! :*(

No, actually, I would have much prefered it had you said “banana.”

You realize we cut every footlong in half, right, genius? We also dice shit pretty regularly. We also bake our bread and cookies multiple times a day.

There’s no Passing Lane if you encounter a left-turn at an intersection; this issue stems from camping in the left lane on an expressway where you’d have to be in the right lane to exit, anyway. We have an Interstate going through uptown where people are expected to be doing 35 MPH in either lane (it’s 45 MPH, guys!…

In NC the car moving in reverse has right-of-way; so if you’re backing out of your driveway, you can continue to do so, but most drivers use common sense and wait for traffic to clear before doing so.

I don’t have any butter or margarine at work (where I’ve been making instant mashed potatoes as of late,) so I’ve been substituting EVOO and garlic aioli. Then I add a sprinkle of salt and McCorrmick Garlic Butter seasoning, and some light, finely-dice red onions (I don’t have access to shallots there) before I toss…