Well...breasts...and buttcheeks. Those are both OK. Worked for Kim K, anyway.

“Give it to me, Elon! All 12mm!”

Nah, they’re too fancy for that. They’ll probably buy a casino in Monaco, and end it all by having an Eyes Wide Shut-style orgy, sipping champagne spiked with Deathstalker Scorpion venom. Damn hippies!

Not planning on doing anything like this in the short-term, either; but I have a profound respect for the people that are making themselves guinea pigs to pioneer biohacking. I’m pretty sure at some point down the road, there’s going to be some incredible concept that withstands the rigors of human trials, and I’m…

Eh, wedding bands are banned from quite a few professions, like foodservice or automotive repair, etc...

Or just use the one already installed in your smartphone. No need to reinvent the wheel.

Not as hard or expensive as you think; I paid $40 for a biometric padlock when I was working at the chicken plant, and it was fucking awesome! The only real downside was that after word got out, everybody and their momma decided to try to defeat by it placing their greasy-ass thumbs on the scanner, so it required…

They do, in fact, sell pasta bowls. Again, this is easily demonstrable given the fact that they are listed on the official website.

No, those were the Bread Bowls; I’m talking about the Pasta Bowls:

Screw the lettuce; it has almost no flavor and absolutely no nutritional value. Spinach has flavor, and is a great source of fiber, Vitamin B-12, and Vitamin C. If you’re going to pad-out your tiny-ass burgers with a filler, at least go with the good shit.

The problem is staffing; there simply aren’t enough people on staff to have dedicated remote-order workers, so everybody has to pitch-in to get all the orders completed.

Of a Papa Johns pizza? It’s literally the only reason I never order PJs. The shitty crust is the sole reason they started selling the garlic butter sauce packets, and the main reason Pizza Hut and Dominos eats their lunch in market share.

They actually make pasta bowls that come in foil pie tins, as does Pizza Hut.

Nah, the Cripsy Bacon and Tomato and the Sweet BBQ Bacon are Bomb-As-Fuck. Fuck the haters; we all know they’re just chunks of chicken breasts, you don’t have to be an idiot and tell us in the Comments every time “boneless” wings are mentioned.

They do, as well as a Pizza Hut...and they’ve both doing it for a long time. They’re called pasta bowls, so these aren’t innovative at all. Congrats to Papa Johns for finally making a product that excludes the shittiest part of their pizza (the crust), but also completely failing to see that their crust is absolute…

?

I like the flavor of onion, but I can’t stand the texture for some reason...but if I dice ‘em up and sautee ‘em, they’re pretty good.

Seriously? Drinking beer through a straw will fuck. you. up!

I assume Sony’s just the lowest-hanging fruit, so if this lawsuit’s successful, they can gain momentum against Microsoft...which, IIRC, would probably send a retail clerk to court in place of a lawyer.

Pizza Rolls in the tub, garlic butter sauce in the bottom. Did I just blow your mind?