Had to remind me, didn’t you?

“...known Asian, Emma Stone.”

Oh god, it’s happening.

that is the most amazing flex on the kardashians

What you doing in here, Kris? Don’t you have some momaging to do?

Pack yourself up and leave, you asshat. I’m not any less an American than you are, just because I would like our country to be a decent place to live.

Sweden is starting to look like a very nice place to live.

I’ve taught you well, grasshopper. Thank you.

No no no. Shade is like when you get a sunburn without direct exposure and a burn is like standing in the sun for 4 hours without sunblock with no protection whatsoever. Shade is nuanced, indirect, discreet. It can take hours to realize you've been burned. A burn is direct, unapologetic, and out in the open. You know…

Oh, honey...

A lot of the answer is right there in your second sentence.

yeah, but can they make mursik out of it?

This is incredibly well written and well thought out. I’m sorry that your name pops up with such a terrible association, that must hurt but seriously great job on this piece.

lol not mad

As he should!

Rick Santorum’s presidential bids remind of this one guy I know who starts liking all of my facebook posts everytime he hears that I'm single.