I can vouch for this technique - I changed my arm slot and can now reach my remote control 2-3% faster.

My first car - a 1985 Volvo 244GL that I drove like it was made of adamantium, and my second car - a 1965 Chevy fleet side short bed that I bought with the money a painting company gave me after one of their vans rear ended me.

What’s NYT doing that NPR isn’t doing better?

I don’t know, man, it’s pretty rugged. First, there’s a bunch of TIFs to hand out to literally everyone. Then you gotta be good at wringing your hands over schools that are doing just fine. And then you have to break a folding chair over the sherriff’s back. It’s pretty complicated.

It’s because we didn’t understand that the word “Commissioner” could apply to non-sports entities.

Good luck on the GRE

The upside is that he’ll be better than Manziel was

Here’s how the trauma of being a lifelong Browns fan works: my immediate reaction was, “Wait, could we get the Cowboys to go for that?”

“Gun to head” is precisely how I watch all Browns games.

Same. No Wahoo since my 1995 ALCS shirt.

That’s Prince Humperdink, right?

I think it’s because fucking franchises are illegal in the rest of the country. I don’t know for sure, though. I’ll have to check with Lamar Odom.

The laughable irony of this carpet-bagging job hopper trying to control where anyone goes when they leave a program is almost too much to comprehend.

“Well can my number be a upside-down capital L then?”

So literally anywhere in Texas?

Not as pissed as Bernie Kosar is.

Who?

I’m no doctor, but I bet a 2x4 to the face would help

Safe to assume Kizer will helm a better offense next year.

Piss off, Uncle Mike