artless.dodger
artless-dodger
3/23/17
12:20 PM
216

No to play Captain Obvious here, but that person who said you deserved getting your breast twisted for talking to the guy? That person is not your friend. Read more

3/22/17
9:26 AM
3

You know how when you have a strong immune system, you can handle little colds and things, but if your immune system is compromised, the smallest germ can lay you out? Read more

3/19/17
9:42 PM
14

They can just row around the land parts and sneak in by sea, since our Coast Guard budget has been cut and can only cover two guys in a dingy as sea-defense.

3/19/17
9:14 PM
1

It absolutely is exhausting. I’ve added it to my list of things to talk about if I ever find a therapist because I KNOW there’s some underlying issue for me.

3/19/17
10:15 AM
3

I clean every week. I have an unnecessarily complex chore matrix because I love spreadsheets and am a germaphobe in equal measure.

3/18/17
3:38 PM
1

Ha, same. My parents works for the State of PA for most of their lives, and they’d call me on random days and wonder why I was working. Read more

3/18/17
8:31 AM
1

You know if it had been Officer Chad Whitman, Serini would already be buried in the bowels of Rikers, waiting to be charged in some cooked-up drug deal.

3/17/17
3:30 PM
2

Well, she IS the new leader of the free world. Sucks to lose a job opportunity to a woman....

3/17/17
8:13 AM
3

Okay, but five minutes is five minutes. I could strike out against Amy Schumer, or I could masterbate in the shower....

3/16/17
9:22 PM
1

Speaking from experience, I can say that the best balm to soothe a grief-stricken heart is to adopt another dog. I think it’s a wonderful tribute to Beau - that he was that good of a dog* - that you want another. Read more

3/16/17
9:18 PM
11

Jesus Christ, such EFFORT. I don’t like Amy Schumer, so I a.) don’t watch her and b.) don’t watch her. I don’t build fucking bots to down vote her projects. Who the fuck has time for that?!? I barely have time to get five hours of sleep before I have to haul my dead ass out of bed for work.

3/16/17
9:14 PM
2

Yeah, for $90 a month I could get an occasional maid or dog walker to help with trying to cram 50 hours of life into a 24 hour day.

3/16/17
3:09 PM
3

Cat Resources isn’t there to protect the employee. It’s there to protect the company from frivolous lawsuits about hairballs, tracked litter, and things batted from heights that then shatter.