At the Greek-owned Lincoln Lodge in Decatur, Ill., I ran across a lovely liqueur called Zamoura. It was purplish dark, more syrupy than Ouzo with a tremendous licorice flavor — and I do not enjoy licorice. I bought a bottle years ago but it’s long gone and I can’t find it online and I live hundreds of miles away now…

This is a tremendously accurate portrayal of the facts.

That’s just WAC.

Doug Stanhope did this once years ago. He had a TV morning news promo appearance to do in San Francisco or somewhere out that way. But he stayed up all night boozing, so when the time came he sent a local open-mic’er in his place and nobody was the wiser.

All I need is a mirror for that!

I’m with Erik on the DEVO ‘78 performance. There are three moments that left me staring at the TV screen slackjawed for about a full minute after the moment ended: 1) This DEVO performance; 2) The MTV “World Premiere” of “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” and 3) The first Red Room scene during the original run of Twin Peaks.…

I am an old man, but to my recollection showers were MANDATORY after every gym class (except square dancing and written tests), and also after every sports team practice. The teacher/coach was right there, handing out towels and scanning the locker room to spot any sneaks.

What a shitty episode. It’s as if MacFarlane hired the Kids of Widney High to write and direct an episode of Black Mirror.

SlingTV just had a major fucking fail tonight. Service threw thousands of users off about 20 to 40 minutes before TWD started, and they couldn’t get back in. It finally restarted for me at 8:33 after 12 reboots of my Roku 3. Sling had a similar problem two years ago, again on the night of a TWD premiere. Today, the…

Chase is the most horrible, nastiest, shittiest usury provider in America. And you are a whore for selling advertising to them. Hulk up and grow a backbone, don’t sell to these life-ruining vampires.

Chase is the most horrible, nastiest, shittiest usury provider in America. And you are a whore for selling…

John was a phenomenal actor. The soul of this show, which — I don’t give a fuck, I’m saying it out loud right now — is the best comedy in television history. And yes, I’m 57 and I grew up watching MTM and Lucy and MASH and Seinfeld and Cheers and all of them — even Heat Vision and Jack. This one had swearing and dope…

You can’t ‘IMPROV’ on perfection.

Vice President Pence sees this as OK, so long as he doesn’t kneel while hoovering the percs.

I have finally learned to NEVER buy ground beef on regular shopping trips. I always just pop to the store and buy it right when I need it. For me, and I would surmise for many of us, it takes no more time to do that than it does to fart around with packaging and freezing and thawing it, or (in this suggestion) cooking…

I absolutely LOVE that Lindsay told the Cub Scout joke. That’s usually the one I use to slam the door shut when my normie friends try to gross each other out with “dirty” jokes.

Goose Island. It’s Chicago’s Crab Brewer.

Fixing for you:

Then serve on BACON PANCAKES

I drew quick stares at the grocery yesterday when I walked in and saw the new honeycrisp apple display and barked out “YES!”

I suggested — I actually sent several emails — that the Bill and Linda Gates Foundation do exactly this. It would be their greatest act of aid to humanity. No response.

First off, let me be clear: In my opinion, Donald Trump is an unfortunately indelible shit-stain on the underpants of U.S. history. No question, he is in the running to be the biggest mistake America has ever made.