No, this guy’s way too out of touch with reality for that.

Just look at this graph! Aviation safety has really tanked! /s

Yeah, all they had was mortadella...

Nah, the cows make the milk. Amazon just wants a cut.

Did you misspell “Christie”? 

Damnit, Avenatti! This is not the pee tape we’ve been waiting for.

Yes, we must keep those little syrup troughs intact!

It’s rich in electrolytes! Good for muscle cramps.

I think you might be an elf.

Why go to a nice steakhouse when you could just go to the Golden Corral?

Judge away, barista. It could be worse. I could be working at a Starbucks.

Well, at least it’s not another product that can be brewed. “Lipton Tea Stadium - Home of the Brewers” would have been too much of a direct affront to the drinking town.

make really good use of it and add it to a Filet-O-Fish?

How about all those pepsi cups in bohemian rhapsody? Historically accurate product placement!

https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2014/01/tsa-business-security-theater-not-security/357599/

The man is fashioning an igloo to house his family, leave him alone.

To quote the ghost of Duke Ellington:

Which understandably left people pretty so curious as to what the hell it was doing there in the first place.

Evil never dies. He’s gonna live till he’s 98 and will still look like fat bastard.

Show me your pivot chart!