Does John Daly really have a chick on the bag? That seems . . . hazardous.

T.Y. Webb would like a word, Mr. Oshie.

You mean those completely unremarkable, well-fitting, solid-colored trousers?

Thanks, yet again, for the reminder of how completely terrible you are at your job, you miserable, talentless loser. I'll be back tomorrow to savor more of your clumsy, humorless prose and hackneyed rhetorical questions.

Except, Samer really, really sucks at sports writing, too.

I think you meant Chapter 7, but nicely done, nonetheless.

You could have done your fucking job and provided some context regarding the identity of your protagonist and his connection to the world of sport, you absolutely worthless piece of shit.

Somewhere, that same "dude" is reading this post and longing for the excitement of that press conference.

Samer Kalaf begs to differ.

Thanks for today's reminder of how much you suck at your job, Samer. I'll be back tomorrow for more shitty, humorless writing on topics that nobody gives a shit about.

People, please, let us not allow this little tiff between journalist and blogger to distract us from the more pressing point at hand: that Samer Kalaf is undeniably a twat of the first order. On that, surely, we can all agree.

Your comment suggests that it would be humorous if only it were more difficult to pull off. That doesn't make any sense.

I'm sorry, but if you consider all of the evidence, you'll realize that it most definitely was NOT a boner.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, Mario Gotze absolutely did NOT have an erection in those earlier photos. If anything, these photos further prove that point. Yet, while you correctly identify the flaccid state of Mr. Gotze's penis on this occasion, you continue to mischaracterize the rigidity of the same penis on that earlier…

Jury duty is a blessing. But, if you're really worried about missing work, don't be. Unless it's grand jury duty, you will likely check in, sit around all morning, take an hour for lunch, come back and sit around for another hour or two, and be dismissed around 2:00 pm. It's unlikely you will even make it to voir…

Nah, not really. Blues Traveler was interesting for a brief moment, but never much more than that.

Hold the fucking phone. Deadspin poking fun at the quality of any other outlet's journalism or prose is insulting enough to readers. But to expend far more effort and creative thought in such an endeavor than it has on reporting actual stories, cumulatively, in several months is going too far.

"The max" for what? Are you implying that this hypothetical African American woman has committed welfare fraud? If so, do you think welfare fraud should go unpunished? If so, will you feel nostalgic for the United States of America after our government necessarily collapses on itself under such circumstances?

I mean, the complete lack of even a rudimentary understanding of our legal system (to say nothing of basic reading comprehension) that's evident in this "reporting" is, frankly, sort of frightening.

1) Yes, that is still a lot of texts.