Is that because you live with your mom?

But it will be all that more believable when he catches fire and becomes the Human Torch.

I grew up a Mets fan because Florida didn’t have a baseball team and fuck the Braves but started rooting for the Marlins when they started playing. I’m finally fucking sick of them and Loria especially, I’ll go back to rooting for the Mets in the NL East and I’ll just be a Rays fan to represent Florida.

It’s clearly a case of Helvetica Scenario. Of course you wouldn’t know with your terrible American science education.

It’s pretty simple. Veterans don’t have massive lobbying arms and bags full of cash to throw at politicians.

Aw man those jailhouse guys are dicks. I bet they got him with the old PEN15 club joke and it says “LIFETIME PENIS LOVER.”

In the comic which the series is based off (if I recall correctly) some angels come to Hell to complain about how Lucifer is running things and he’s like, “Fuck it. Here’s the keys, take good care of the place. I’m out.” Sadly, I doubt the show will live up to it. I’ll just read the comics again.

What if he refuses to give the guy a pizza in exchange for the ball b/c he finds out the guy who took the ball is gay? Surely that’s worth $80,000.

It does make a persuasive argument against single-payer healthcare because if I found out my tax dollars were paying the medical bills of some dumb asshole who insists on instigating fights with animals in spite of repeatedly losing I’d be pretty goddam angry.

I’m almost certain she’s saying that the nurses are lower class and therefore less likely to care for the well-being of others.

It seems somewhat counterintuitive when a number of feminists are pushing to repeal laws outlawing female toplessness. If the men running were sporting erections then I would definitely say it constitutes sexual harassment but the naked human body is not obscene. I definitely sympathize with survivors of sexual…

A DUI with bodily injury is usually a felony as well.

That turtle is giving some serious side-eye. You can tell he’s thinking, “Ugh, fucking tourists get out of the way.”

One year my family had dinner to celebrate my sister’s birthday. As it was her birthday she asked everyone around the table to pay her a compliment. When it came to my turn I paused reflectively then said, “I like how you’re not ashamed.” Needless to say it hasn’t become a family tradition.

I once watched a tow truck driver drag a car out of a spot then get out to secure it, only to see him get back in the truck and push the car back into the spot and drive off. I was curious so I walked down to take a look and found the car profusely spilling oil into the street. So forgive me for giving this lady the…

Sorry I just read too fast. I didn’t even recall Jefferson was on the $2.

Mostly the Indian Removal Act in which somewhere around 10-20% of the Native Americans removed from lands east of the Mississippi died, otherwise known as the Trail of Tears. But the general racism and corruption of his administration shouldn’t be overlooked either.

There are actually some newer studies out linking depression and inflammation. It’s nothing proven yet but it’s hopeful to see a mental disorder linked to a physical ailment.

The football teams at major institutions of higher footballing (FSU, Alabama, USC, Notre Dame, OSU, etc.) always make more than enough profit to cover the coaches salaries, probably in athletic booster donations alone. Unfortunately making academia a more compelling career choice will require more systemic changes…

All that matters to a famous person is that someone will.