Force them to write a public mea culpa once the verdict is overturned.

Go to D.C. and see the Cherry Blossoms at the Jefferson Memorial. For all the hype and hassle, it lives up to billing.

That’s amazing accuracy. I hope an MLB team signs that guy as a pitcher so he can drill batters in the dick.

“This is totally unbecoming of a first lady. Everyone knows the words are ‘Bomb Iran.’” - John McCain

Copycats. Everyone knows that JFK did the original Barbara Ann.

Final Fantasy IX was never keen on clouds...

No, no. Zidane saves. Cloud was from VII.

(yes, I’m joking)

Teens Like Their Meat Big, Hard, & Throbbing 3

If anyone should know about making up stories to profit off them, it’s Mitch Albom.

But he uses semicolons correctly, so he’s got a leg up on like 95 percent of us.

The closest I was with was probably [Tom] Brady [and] whom I love to death

Evidently the last person who told him not to write outside of the margins got stabbed with a Bic pen.

Starting to look more like MGS than FF.

So now Noctis & Co are infiltrating Shadow Moses to destroy Metal Gear(s)?

and has never done cocaine

Not only diaper poop but how about warm tub poops? When my kid was two or three and had a little problem with constipation she’d hold that fucker in all day and then settle her butt into a nice warm bath and inevitably: poop. Poop that I had to chase around with a washcloth/cup/bare hand as it bobbed and floated all…

That crinkling sound was him opening the crackers, which he then PUT DOWN ON THE FLOOR.