I mean if there aren’t men it’s other women or celibacy no?

I could take or leave the cats but you had me at all the clothes have pockets.

I like imgur. All the time “feminazi” posts. Over and over and in the comments are all these women being like “the fuck is a feminazi!? Who has actually seen/met one in real life?”. It’s a straw woman where you project all this BS and then prove its ridiculous and thus so is feminism in general. Blech.

Sandwiches would naturally go extinct to be replaced by the clearly superior panini and wrap.

Drop Dead Gorgeous is eternally funny. It’s one of those movies you can watch over and over and over and still guffaw.

Ah, you’re doing the lord’s work. Many thanks.

I was fine and then the last 2 months: BAM. I’m also really short so it had nowhere to go but out so maybe that also contributed. See I have the extra skin/fat or whatever plus the lovely little puckered ridges from stretch marks too. They used to be a lovely purple but now they’re just white. Good times.

And the extra baby skin around your belly plus stretch marks. That’s one of the things I always get confused with: do some women just have zero stretch marks? How do all these hollywood starlets get back pre-baby bodies with no stretch marks?

Please tell me there’s a name for masterbating while pooping? BRB.

That’s always the calculation that causes me to be like “Yup, having a beer.” So I skip beer, eventually drop those last few pounds or so and then what? Maybe, MAYBE go down a size? And.... and what? As it stands I am happily married, husband still finds me sexy, I like the way I look in clothes, I’m healthy.... so…

Because it’s so hard maybe? It’s a status symbol? Like how being fat was once and still is in some places a status symbol in some cultures because it signifies you have the time/money to eat and not exercise (same with soft hands and being super pale). Now it’s being super skinny and toned because it means you have…

We want kid #2 and now pregnancy just got even scarier: Yay Zika! Is it in your husband’s sperm, your body? What’ll happen? Great, because I needed something else to be terrified over.

I literally just finished a reply basically outlining the exact same conflict with my husband. It makes me feel better to know I’m not alone, but then kind of depressed cause we are all dealing with the same damn BS.

Ah emotional labor. My husband bitched about how he has to put our son to bed when he gets home from work. Just brush his teeth, read book, put in bed: 20 minutes. I’m usually cooking dinner. He went on and on about how he got no time to decompress. I was like okay, sure I hear you. I’ll put him to bed (I already pick…

I love toddlers, 2 1/2 is my favorite age so far. I loved my baby but I enjoy my toddler. They start to emerge as little people with senses of humor, ideas about things, personality quirks. It’s a lot of fun. Peed in the potty for the first time last night so yay!!! But his reason for doing it was to stall bedtime,…

Could it have something to do with gestational diabetes? Because that was what was impressed upon me was that the goal was for me to avoid getting gestational diabetes (I was already like 40lbs overweight). I came close, had to do the sugar test and passed but it would have meant a lot more doctor’s visists and…

Okay thanks! I'm going to go around diagnosing people as pregnant all day. What can go wrong? ;)

I thought it was just obvious. I love that song, LOVE IT. But clearly, that was a drunk man.

Can you help us novices learn to recognize the signs? What’s this look?

Fuckin’ Craig Mazin.