Just waiting for you guys to post this. It is traumatic, yes. But our hearts will go on. (She's age-appropriate and a woman of substance—that's comforting, right?)

Leaving this here.

I was thisclose to modifying my Forever Lazy into an Eeyore this year, but I went with something with more spiders. Now I'm glad because it means I have the ability to turn it into a walrus.

Like, 13 years ago, I got arrested for "borrowing" an RV that was for sale in my neighbors yard. He had left the keys in the ignition. My pal and I (totally sober btw) decided to take it for a spin around the block. When we got back the cops were waiting for us. My neighbor didn't press charges. He actually kinda…

Also see: "Let's eat, Grandma!" vs. "Let's eat Grandma"

What about cutest, funniest kids...

She walked away and told our manager who didn't want to approach the table because he was afraid of the man. He told her to apologize to them.

That's when a guy walks up with the missing forty dollars and tells the woman it was on the floor by their table. To which she says "bullshit" and storms out saying that I'm a fucking thief. Moral of the story is, don't give small children lots of cash.

I imagine that guy probably paid out of his own pocket to make the…

I will never understand the mentality of people who go to a restaurant to torment a server. I go to enjoy the company of the people I am with and the food I am eating. If there is a hiccup along the way, hopefully it gets resolved, but I have never wanted to throw a chicken at a waitresses chest.

This video completely changed my view of this song. Now anytime I hear it instead of moan and groan, I just think of He Man, and sing at the top of my lungs. The internet is a strange place. And sometimes that strangeness is great.

Doesn't hold an candle to He Man. 0:28.

Need link to said harmonica pictures to be sure. For uh, Science.

I post this video far too often, but...

I have no idea who this fuckrag is, but I've been following these stories and I'm curious: are there any photos that exist of him where he isn't mugging for the camera? Jezebel has done like 3 stories and in every one he is always smiling, dressed well on a red carpet or something. No one has a photo of him in…

She also reminded victims that there is no statute of limitations on sexual assault, and that incidents can be investigated at any time.

hot dogs?