Your username is amazing.

I'd shoot it, cook it, and sell its skin

If (read:never) I ever get married, I'm just not gonna invite anyone

I AM THE MEAL

sexytimes in public is sexy, but everything after that was just fucked up

"There is a special place in hell for people who mistreat their servers on Mother's Day. As a Mom, it's your special day, and you deserve to be pampered. So do the other 2-4 Moms in your server's section,"

It's been 2-3 years, and I still don't know any of my neighbors.

One guy trying to get me to sleep with by insisting that he had already turned five other lesbians straight.

You probably would have ended up as chopped up pieces inside a freezer

Was she a Martian?

Better "Brooklyn" than "Bella".

"Bionic body??"

For me, I'm going to save up tons of money to be able to afford cybernetic replacement parts for my body if/when they become available.

Money buys me the freedom and security to pursue happiness.

With an audience, I hope?

I get people who will walk around the craft beer aisles for like 15-30 minutes, occasionally asking about such and such product.

nevermind

edit: nevermind wrong thread

Not to mention it only affects bovines.