I’m a 43 year old dad to an 11 yr old girl. I cried too.

strafing herds of feral hogs.

hahahah that eye roll!

He’s lamenting what he feels is a loss in journalistic integrity, he’s pining for the salad days if you will.

Oh sure. Now he’s against release.

Massachusetts Man attempts to purchase tape of his own handjob. 

I never really thought about this before so I gave it a shot. I’m sad to report that my imagination no longer works because try as I might, the scenarios you present were so beyond reality that I had a stroke trying to visualize them and I am now dead. Please send flowers to my family. 

So like “The food made me ill but the restroom was clean enough to throw up in.”?

Joe Namath watches video, furiously scribbles notes.

“Protect yourself at all times.”

They did their homework: the music playing when Kane looks at the egg is Jerry Goldsmith’s original score for the scene, which was not used in the final mix.

Ta ta, shirt. 

Just going to go out on a limb here and say that Ja rules.

Unfortunately the video has already been leaked by the BBC:

ESPN 30 for 30 presents: Three Tugs and a Cloud of Dust: The Manipulation of Robert Kraft 

What a coincidence. I don’t want to see a video of Robert Kraft getting a hand job. I happen to like having eyeballs.

I think an unintended (or maybe it was intended by the bill payers) side effect of advanced metrics is that it has killed the star in baseball. You can look at it as trying to find a market inefficiency, sure, but it also can be looked at like “we don’t want to spend money, let’s find a cheaper option.” It’s weird…

I put it to you that Keuchel and Kimbrel have not yet been signed because they have big bushy beards, and while their names begin with “K” (denoting strikeouts), they end with “L” (denoting losses).

I have a theory. I think it’s an inner ear deficiency. Hear me out. (pun). OK inner ear directs balance and depth perception. You notice how on a dance floor people of color move around each other effortlessly? Even unseen people, we sense the distance of people behind us. White people will bump into people. Always.…

It gives me this vibe. It will happen. Be rich enough.