When I met you at the show, you came off as a much cleaner man than one that had taken a shower in a sink. I suppose that’s a testament to your hygenic efficacy.

It’s been gone for a week. He already replaced it with a nifty old FJ.

Isn’t it just a two-part formula of serious front-end camber and an insanely modified steering knuckle?

“I’d wager it doesn’t seem as good as the similarly-priced Continental either.”

The ATS is a personal luxury coupe.

2 great selling products is one thing.

But it’s easier than developing an entirely new platform. I’m not saying it’s simple. Hell, I looked at the rear end of the Avenir and damn near fainted when I thought of the stamping costs required for that rear hatch.

The thing is, they could. The concept is built on the Alpha platform. It wouldn’t be obscenely difficult to bring it to production.

If, gods forbid, you don’t make it farther than Ferndale before your first “stop”, I’ve got you.

The person behind the wheel is what makes the car fun. If you can’t occupy a mindspace where there’s potential within each and every car on the road, then you’re not going to have fun. It requires a kind of exuberance for motoring that your average driver lacks (present company excluded, natch).

My cool BMW story is that I shot all this stuff. It was all pretty cool.

Another downside of Choice Number One is that some pricks will take a car parked far away as some sort of elitist move, like having a fancy car makes you better than the hoi polloi, and will thus park in the space next to yours, or even worse, park as close to your car as humanly possible. It’s almost inviting trouble.

Nobody really knew what the fuck was going on. I was at that press conference. I didn’t really figure it out until they were already hauling him off the stage. It was fucking awkward more than anything.

Um, Acura’s press site says it’s debuting at New York.

They are, I drove them yesterday. The mods are limited: A basic spacer-style lift for the suspension and tracks that bolt right onto the hubs. That’s it. The tracks are swapped off in transit since the cars would be too wide for the carrier truck they’re using.

I’m really glad I submitted this. You did it justice, Torch.

Still working through the salvo of games gifted from the holidays.

I’ll make a point to see if I can slip into a car with X-Ices. I’ve only ever owned Blizzaks, and the WS70s have saved me from many an issue. Hoping the WS80s are even better.

Oh, just buy some damn Blizzaks.

Thanks! I made it in the hopes that a clever name would earn me a star on Deadspin, even if my jokes weren’t the cleverest.