Look, I hate tabloids too, but how are we not giving Us an A+ for divulging that Arya and the Hound are real life BFFs who speak to each other in a secret egg language? ADORABLE.

All the people who are yelling "sunscreen!" seriously?? You still tan while wearing sunscreen. I put it on regularly and will still get 3-4 shades darker in a matter of hours.

Oh please. Things like that are always so fake. Why, I can watch that episode of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air with Ben Vereen as Will's dad all the time and I..don't...excuse me a second.

"Because of this, and the fact that Rihanna appeared to be naked except for high heels,"

Mmmm. Fassbender.

I'm in this weird zone where I'm just big enough to require a bra most of the time, but not big enough to have any real va-va-voom cleavage.

This isn't a vote for Jolie's Cleopatra, but Cleo and everyone in her family were the products of fairly rigorous inter-breeding within one family, the Ptolemys (new reality show idea??) who were Greek. The original Ptolemy was one of Alexander the Great's generals who, after Al died, divvied up his empire. Ptolemy…

How quickly Putin forgets how Canada came into his backward ass country and took the only hockey gold that matters.

Putin:"Crimea river, Finland!"

I love you Lindy. I think I'm going to send this to my boyfriend and mom. I got a new job and I might have enough money soon for the chin implant I've been dreaming of for YEARS. When I told them that, they basically said that they were sorry I felt that way and they hoped I could learn to love myself without surgery.…

Thanks for this. I love the way I look now, and plan to go gray and embrace my wrinkles when the time comes and be a hot old dame and all that jazz, but the second age starts to meld my chin and neck together, I'm getting that shit tucked, zero fucks given.

I swear to dog I scrolled down through this whole list just looking to see where Patrick Stewart would be and my heart actually started to pound at about 10 at the idea that you guys had left him out. I am so sorry for my doubt, however short-lived.

I am livid at you right now, Colin.

I had a boss who subscribed to this philosophy once.

They live in California. This kid was up at at least 3:30am for this, I would fall back asleep too.

Note: this will make you seem extremely stupid.

Come on... "100% needed to win"? I hate both teams, but it's quite the stretch to suggest this was a "must-win" for Montreal ("highly-preferred win" absolutely).

I sound like a convulsing robot when I fake laugh. My real laugh is like a cross between a manic hyena and Barry White (very fast paced but oddly low).