And she retired just in time to end a court inquiry into her involvement in her brother’s tax-evasion scheme.

If only we could get the same result from him.

Even if the story is true, he had to be both drunk and have someone else with him. Then he laughed it off the next day.

If that’s the case, he should have done it decades ago.

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, the White House, is the place I have come to love and will stay for, hopefully, another 5 years

A statement was issued yesterday saying that less than 1% of Deadspin traffic was on non-sports articles.

Sure, she called for it - but she didn’t vote on that bill.

And Tulsi Gabbard didn’t vote at all.

STICK TO THINGS THAT AREN’T WHITE, SPORTS, POLITICS, AND OTHER THINGS TO BE NAMED LATER

Yeah, at least make a half-assed attempt at subtlety.

Hey, maybe an officer’s grandfather fought for Germany in WWII.

Trump constantly makes that mouth shape when he’s talking. How is that possible? I’ve tried to do it intentionally and have not been able to do it.

Dear Ivanka,

And, with that, Melania became a bit more relatable to me.

My son texted me this morning to say he’s wondering if Trump thinks he actually gave a medal to a dog.

So they even suck at that.

Hey, not having any articles about the end of a thrilling World Series this morning is part of his strategy.

It’s like 9/11 - AN ACTUAL CONSPIRACY wasn’t good enough, so they had to make up different ones.

Most likely Trump heard the phrase “wag the dog” and his dementia-addled brain ran with it.