I am only partially ashamed to admit I remember Hee Haw fondly. We watched it at my grandparents’ house, and sang along with the stupid songs — “Where, oh where are you tonight?” and the one about bad luck. And it was only later that I realized what awesome musicians the two male stars were.

I have a genius solution. Every pair needs to come with a bottle of their obscenely beautiful perfume. Ba-len-ci-aaaahhh-gaaaaawwd.

Michelle, ma belle.

Came here for this.

Wow, thanks!

Like rich white people aren’t scamming the system any way they can. Like calling it “tax avoidance” rather than “tax evasion.”

Whiteley admits he’s not the first person to make this claim. Back in the 1990s, German artist Rosemarie Lierke reached a similar conclusion, but her writings weren’t accepted on account of lack of evidence penis. 

Beak is just slang for nose, from way back. No offense intended. My grandmother and uncle had similar noses, and we always joked about “the family beak.”

The horse’s ass.

10/10 would preorder the shit out of that book. And BTW, am I the only one that loves a prominent nose on a man? That beak is so hot.

Thanks! I think I called my sister during the commercial, screaming something to that effect. To this day, I’m still scarred.

I know! Can’t believe that’s a 17-year-old.

When my mom was still alive, we threw this one back and forth at each other, and our response would always be, “I’m not ignorant!!”

YES — I now read her quotes in the “sexy secret” voice, just as I shout “Frothy!” at every occurrence of Rick Santorum’s name.

Yes. Cannot unsee.

Har. Land’s End mock turtleneck with Fredricks of Hollywood bathrobe sleeves.

And now we’re like “will somebody shut that dizzy bitch up, already?”

I do think that’s a shame — I know she did it to herself, but she was a lovely young woman before shooting all that shit in her face. And the kicker is, she has already been as beautiful as she ever will be. It’s all WAY downhill from here.

Posted this on another, similar thread — I wonder if Robert Kelly would be ashamed of his father right now.

I’m imagining Robert Kelly would be ashamed of his dad right about now.