This might be the worst minute of scripted television I’ve seen in a while. What in voiceover-narration-hell did I just witness? Is this par for the course on the show?

Just remember, Ben Carson isn’t against allowing rabid refugees into the country. He just wants the Humane Society to come round them up to make the neighborhood safe again, that’s all. It’s a very simple plan, really, why can’t everyone see the logic in this? Would you want your children to be unsafe? No. Vote for…

It’s only a matter of time. Michigan’s legislature tried to pass a law a couple of years ago allowing you to bring guns into previously “gun-free” zones such as “schools, day care centers, bars, churches, hospitals and stadiums.” The governor vetoed it, thankfully, but it easily passed in both the House and Senate.

Yeah, it would have been a much different situation. You’d have had 35 idiots shooting into a crowd of thousands, instead of 10.

After dating Ray J for a while, I would think her birth canal would be ready for anything. That baby should have slid out.

Mr. Gibson would like to have a word with you about his perceived status in the Holy Trinity.

Are there poetry fridge magnets involved?

Now that his book is out, he really has no more reason to be out there.

I came here to see some dong. Left disappointed.

Oh I totally agree. Just saying that “commercializing” Remembrance Day by raising money for it is something I can’t hate on. Thinking that it somehow benefits the troops that there’s a little design on a coffee cup out in the world somewhere, however, is debatable.

Cheating on you, obviously. (This person sounds like they may have some control issues.)

I’ve since started reading this book, and Leah Remini even at her most devoted times simply refused to toe the Scientology line when things didn’t make any sense to her, and often spoke her mind (which inevitably got her in trouble.) So, in all her Brooklyn glory, she diffused the situation by simply asking “Uh, is…

Posthumous Michael Jackson?

Calling out a random letter on the first turn is a good strategy, continuing to do so seems less so when each subsequent letter is worth $1600 apiece to the other contestants. If the guy on the left hadn’t guessed F and won when he did, her strategy would have cost her the game if middle guy picked F and won $12,800…

$160 per screen during the second week... Assuming these wide releases usually get about 3 screenings a day, that’s $7.62 per showing, or half a ticket at today’s prices? Holy shit that’s dismal.

List of acceptable Fedora-wearers:

Everyone was a hologram.

Don’t worry, he’ll be next. And then Pinochet, and Chairman Mao, and so on, until eventually, that guy who cut in line in front of you at Starbucks. Wouldn’t it be better if he had never been born? Yeah.

I bet Soulja boy agrees!