They really should have had Kate McKinnon’s Kellywise skit include this. Missed opportunity.

So a Democrat getting something like 48% of the vote in one of the historically deepest red House districts around, with the next closest “Big R” candidate in the 20's is a “big win” somehow? Fuck this imbecile and his insane worldview.

This is amazing and depressing in equal measure.

If I was printing this piece, I would have put that right in the headline. It’s such a shame that the editors didn’t sign it off as “Sincerely, Sean M. Sphincter”.

This sounds like a Calvin & Hobbes strip.

The only wall we’d like to see built is around Trump Tower (preferably in the night, while Donald is busy hate watching Megyn Kelly or whatever he does with his time in lieu of being President). In fact, this would be a much more affordable wall, and I would chip in to that Kickstarter in an instant.

I wonder if the Secret Service attempted to intervene but Trump stepped in and said to leave his longtime member (whose money is literally lining Trump’s pockets) alone. Just like he had to pop in during the potential crisis to crash a fucking wedding because that guy also paid a lot of cash to be there. It’s unreal.

“Here’s the face and name of a man whose National Security job is so important that it’s literally handcuffed to him at all times. Please like and share this post!”

This does not bode well for the meeting that followed. Trump will be announcing the second wall that Canada will be paying for later this afternoon.

And allowing that asshat to post not only an idiotic smiling photo of the guy who’s carrying the nuclear football, but also to out him as being the guy who carries it? The secret service should have put a bullet through that idiot’s smartphone before allowing him to post any such garbage. These morons are gonna get us…

I’m really hoping that it’s all a matter of gross incompetence, as tragic an expectation as that is of the President of the United States.

Is no one else worried that Trump putting this highly inflammatory and obviously click-baity EO out there was just a ruse to hide some actual sinister shit that quietly slipped past everybody while we were all losing our minds this weekend? Like removing the permanent military presence from the NSC and staffing it…

That man’s a poet laureate by comparison.

Counter-counterpoint: The Donald is very much bald and in deep denial about it.

Up the ass? No, that would be merciful. I’m thinking this is going to be more akin to that one scene in Human Centipede 3 where the prison inmate gets shivved in the side and then... violated thusly.

Yeah, that’s 50 years from now. It’s like $20 bucks a day in pre-Trump inflation dollars.

It’s a weird perspective, the pinky is fine it’s just pointing straight down. The ring finger next to it is folded down and under the hand, so side by side they look like they’re the same length but only when you’re looking at it head on in a flattened perspective.

What happens if you have $40k a day to burn long with an unquenchable poop fetish? Is Westworld still for you?

Why are people even remotely freaking out over this? By the sounds of it, he’s deleting his channel and immediately restarting said channel to get rid of inactive/spam followers. He ain’t going nowhere.

I think it was Jon Nolan himself (twitter maybe?)