Jennifer, I am WITH YOU on being set up. I feel like the basic criteria is: she’s single + he’s single = great couple!

that crucifix girl is crazy if she thinks that thing left her alone after returning it. that spirit is with you for life now, bb.

I know Lindsay is in the wrong here, but...everyone deserves an hour for lunch. I believe in some unions it’s even mandatory. Are there no entertainment/arts unions in Australia?

So the show hired someone who is known for being lazy and unproductive and she’s fired for being lazy and unproductive? Man, you can’t buy that kind of publicity. 

“Free the Juice” is the least surprising thing I see here

he offered to go get ice cream with the kid to patch things up.

“What is the sound of one hand punching .... YOUR FACE”

A lot to unpack here, but, outrages? I know it’s a waste of time to get steamed about this kind of shit with him, but, seriously?

you mean “architecting” the sticker....

Off-topic, but completely relevant to your screen name... I was at the Greenmarket in Union Square here in NYC last Saturday, and this woman walking past was wearing a t-shirt that read “Thank God for Abortions.” I almost fell off my bike, and I was only walking it. Perfect messaging is so rare.

Awwww, he went to Jared!

but this is now

she’s a stupid cunt.

It’s the way her face has been architected.

“Effectuate” annoys me because “effect” is not only a shorter word, it’s also semantically correct.

I made this for you

Why is Taco Day not the first Tuesday of the month?  This is the most half-assed fake holiday I've ever heard of.

It's mostly a man thing.

You mean....

Welcome to the club. My mouth once went out of control in history class, and said “seminal vesssss...” while reading a passage out loud about the Seminole. Didn’t finish the word “vesicle” but everybody knew.