No no no. Mexican Squirt or gtfo.

My thoughts exactly! We throw food at them while they throw cars at us. Fucking assholes. 

I saw him in 2016... worst concert I’ve ever been to.

TROGDOOOOOOOR

I bought a house with my husband about two years ago, and we have a GORGEOUS dining room with a gaudy as fuck chandelier and everything. We NEVER eat in there. We prefer to stand at the kitchen counter because it’s just more practical. The dining room is only for parties or very special meals. 

As someone that works with formaldehyde... yeah. Those are definitely chemical burns. Not “like”. I can’t imagine having to wear it on my body. 

There was a showing of Cleo from 5 to 7 in Chicago a few years back, and she was present for a Q&A. I remember sitting allllll the way in the back and still being able to feel her strong presence. I’ll watch Cleo tonight. 

Especially because I’m pretty he’s a method actor? I saw the movie two weeks ago and it just felt like he was acting like... himself. Great movie though! I went to a q&a with korine and I’m a lil upset because the same theater is doing another screening but with ODORAMA so the whole place is supposed to smell like…

“Caftans” is a fancy way of saying “mumus”. GO FOR IT

Overalls are absolutely a thing and I love feeling like I’m a toddler in them. I only wish mine had a tool hoop so I could carry around a hammer. 

My husband asked me a few weeks ago if he could start wearing my caftans at home. He’s always liked the FREEDOM a dress provides. I told him to raid my closet anytime! I’m excited to see him floating around the house like some glamorous 60s Los Angeles divorcee with a martini in hand. 

Team No Bra

“Freddy Got Fingered”. I was like 11 and had no idea what the hell that even meant. My poor father didn’t either (English is his second language). We walked out about thirty minutes in. 

“Obviously, they can’t take the education out of their heads”

Although he’s definitely not a teen, I feel that my husband is suffering from the consequences of phone over-use. If he’s stressed at work, he doesn’t sleep very well, which means he’s up at 3:30am on his phone for like three hours. When he finally falls asleep, he needs to be up for work only thirty minutes later, so…

Oh noooo I’m so sorry for your loss! Fuck. I know that there aren’t any words to ease your pain, but hopefully you know that you gave her the best life you could <3

How amazing to be so fucking vapid, ignorant, and live in a crazy, blond, over-plastic surgery bubble. How absolutely clueless. She didn’t even TRY.

My mom would brush/style my hair and would leave me in tears every damn time. I don’t think she pulled my hair on purpose but maybe she just didn’t realize how hard she was doing it? Anyway, by age 6 I was doing my own hair because I’d rather look like a crazy person that have my mom touch my hair. I still don’t know…

I’ll take your pasta, thanks. 

When I watch Property Brothers with my husband, we play a game, and we always win at this game. To win, all you have to do is mention the two things they will do to the house. “Open concept” and “massive kitchen island”. Winner!