That’s why I always tell her that I’m happy and everything is going fine.

Let this be a lesson why you should never tell your mother anything.

To be fair, Lochte probably doesn’t know the difference.

As bufuddling as this is I have to remember that Lochte, while not the brightest bulb while sober, was drunk with his pals that night. Not an optimal condition for remembering details, especially for our dog paddling human Labradoodle. Watching the video the guys aren’t laughing, but Lochte slaps one guy with his…

the mini fridge was CLUTCH. Also, if someone on your floor had a decent microwave, that meant ALL the late-night macncheese bowls! (freshman fifteen ftw!)

I have a degree in French from the same college Emily Dickinson attended.

Right like I was super excited when my parents paid the $75 to rent me a bar fridge for the year.

I am not sure any film could make the facts of Dickinson’s life interesting. Her inner life was rich but not in cinematic dramatic power.

Cynthia Nixon’s poetry reading leaves something to be desired.

I didn’t even have Ikea! We used the furniture that came with the dorm. My first roommate was rich and I was middle class, but we both just used hand-me-down appliances and electronics. The only thing we bought was an area rug (cheap dark green from Target) because we had those cheap tile floors you find in most…

“Oh my god youths.” - My early 30s woman words (spoken out loud in my office, for maximum appearance of insanity) when I read your comment. You are right, and they are going to end up murdered.

I clicked too, just because from the dorm photo, I smelled pageant all over her. And yup. Pageant.

I remember taking SO MUCH PRIDE in my poster and fabric tapestry curation in college. (And for good reason: it’s very important not to feel like you live in a cinderblock prison.)

The first. The latter is perfectly fair, provided she’s naturally producing the testosterone.

“It’s not fair, we can’t compete with her innate genetic advantages!”

As a Southerner born-and-bred, this makes me increasingly happy that I went to college in the mountains of North Carolina (what’s up, App State!) We had more of a granola-liberal vibe at our school and I adored every bit of it.

I find it irritating too. College dorms aren’t supposed to be pretty. They’re supposed to be weird and filled with ephemera collected here and there that gives people an idea of your personality. This room looks like it’s housed by girls who deny that they poop and fart, which means they are also probably annoying.

I think it’s the flaunt. There is much flaunt in that picture. Braggery, even.

Definitely not a one off. They will get to use this sort of design talent to paint coolers and make recruitment videos.

I probably need to look into why this annoys me so. But I’m not going to. This annoys me. I’m annoyed. And I’ve decided to be okay with it.