Please note two spaces after each period. DISQUALIFIED FOREVER.

No, they swept them 3-1.

Enjoy your reserved seat next to a boiling lake of acid in Hell.

You had to go there, didn’t you?

If he didn’t want to be tackled by her, he shouldn’t have been dressed like that

Guy hitting .205 in High-A ball is worried about the wrong Mendoza.

Glad this happened to your friend. Maybe he’ll learn his lesson and not completely ruin his car next time.

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

And you are back. We have missed you with the latest set of losses.

Screw bat flips? But it’s ok when a yankee does it? As a fan of every other team AND bat flips, I have a suggestion for where you can place your unwritten rules, yankee pride, and the rest of yankee fandom.

I think you need to go to a dirt track car race and start asking people there.

That is absolutely the nicest number of minutes that anything should be suspended for lightning.

[head explodes]

Arnold Palmer died in Pittsburgh, Pa. today, according to Golfweek. He was +15.

I know I will get killed for this, but I do not think Chris Pratt is good. I think he’s not good.

Ball game!
Endzone is the goal, folks.
Never want to stop watching, it’s so captivating.
God DAMNIT I love me some football.
Here’s to all my football loving compatriots! *Raises glass*
Also, go Giants!
Zukka is what they call me, around these parts.
In case anybody was curious.

Bayless: I agree with you in the big picture, but did you just say that x is y?