RIP

His abilities speak for themselves (according to Wikipedia):

In hindsight, I only wish these athletes and administrators had paused to consider the irreparable damage their actions would cause to the integrity of the Meineke Car Care Bowl.

Looks like someone kilt him.

Almost as fine example of pathetic as this,

"You come at the King, you best not miss."

This doesn't bode too well for the Spurs' plan to debut their new logo in the Berlin game.

Woman: [ Googles "Floyd Mayweather" ]

WBAL reports he had just finished up an eight-hour blackjack session

[blows a fourteen]
[goes to jail]

Phelps's eyes were bloodshoot, "his speech was mush mouth,"

So, that means either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me. Bitches, man.

Wunderlich: /throws haymakers

he tried to sideswipe the vehicle and missed us by a foot

Jason Whitlock: [feels tingling]

It's Benji from Howard Stern. Didn't realize it until I saw on Twitter.

Gonna be a lot of people in Baltimore with Joe Flacco jerseys tomorrow.

Calvin really let himself go.

I've been playing fantasy football a long time, back when everything was done manually, and everything we learned about the game came from newspapers and television. It's just how I was raised. So when some second-rate website says I can't switch Adrian Peterson, it makes me wonder what good all this "progress" has…

This is unfair. The Vikings' numbers are inflated thanks to the "Cardiac" column.