Jason Garrett's a serious contender for the Football Fields Medal.

As a defensive tackle, much of your improvement is dependent on your willingness to study and break down your technique by watching film.

So he was wearing Starburys...

If he really was crying crocodile tears—well, those stairs aren't going to run themselves, now are they, Antonio?

And, with that, the "No outside food and beverages" policy at La Chalet Restaurant and Banquet Center was born...

1. That baby is an ignoramus—he'd probably rather be at Jay Cutler's awkward ass 80's party than pitch horseshoes with Randy Moss. Babies are stupid—and they usually suck at horseshoes.

This is nonsense. Digging Deeper is a legit course—my brother sat behind the kid who went to class for Tyler Hansbrough.

You'd think Saban would be against divisional realignment but he probably thinks he can win in the East.

Role Tide!

Normally the reasons behind this would b-complex to figure out

Foodspin would like to have a word...

Zook only lasted two days in mortgage lending after continually yelling "Go for two!" whenever someone mentioned points.

Appears the national pastime is mangling the word pastime. Oh, and being raycess.

+1

So my "Happy Easter—Eat a bag of dicks!" John Rocker ball may be worth something after all...

After striking the cameraman at the German Grand Prix, the tire continued north and took over Poland.

+1

Does flag etiquette require these trousers to be folded into a triangle before joining all Daly's other shit in his luggage?

I SAID GOOD DAY!

There's a Corvette Festival with a one thousand car parade this weekend in Champaign, IL. That's 1000 f'ing fast cars driving really slow—it baffles me that this even exists.