I’d like to point out, and I’m sure I’m not the only one to notice, that six out of the twelve shown articles on mobile (I’m on an iPhone 5) are about rape or other forms of sexual misconduct.

Well, I dealt with the pain of contracts on a Friday by not doing the reading and im-ing with my classmates all through class. Of course, that’s how I dealt with the pain of contracts on Monday and Wednesday too....

I thought it odd that Michelle Williams of Blue Valentine fame would be depressed over Destiny’s Child. Did you?

I feel like all First Ladies should get a body double for when they don’t feel like being trotted out for the media. Even if this were true, my reaction would still be *shrug*.

Hey, Raffi is way more punk than Ivanka. Also, he really hates Trump https://mobile.twitter.com/Raffi_RC

I care. That’s great!

UGH. Stop making me miss you.

My reflux loves beer and hates soda. Natural carbonation is apparently great, but artificial carbonation is evil. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Room temperature bottled water. I hate cold beverages.

I’m in the midst of a horrendous fight with my parents - actually my mom - and need to confront her. I haven’t spoken to her in a week. When I was younger and lived at home she made my life horrible, denied me everything that could make me happy, set me up for a life of unhappiness, and as an adult I find that she…

To get started, here’s mine, as thought of right now at this very moment and subject to extreme change:

Here’s a full video of Jennifer’s performance.

I had a hideous dream the other night about dining with Chinese diplomats (don’t ask me why, I’ll never move in those circles, I’m not fancy) and being forced to eat a series of century eggs. As someone horrified by ordinary eggs, you’ll understand my haunting horror.

My dad has had a bee in his bonnet for YEARS that I should be a stand up comic. Because that’s a career you can just start, right? I keep telling him that I’m too old and tired and married to haul myself around to clubs and put up with all the harassment and death/rape threats.

My grandma is having some health issues and was worried about money for doctor stuff and I’m really proud that I was able to just wire her some money to get it done. She was so appreciative and relieved and said some nice things and I’m just so happy that I could have helped!

Drinking a margarita plus cilantro garnish my man made me - I might need a couple after learning today that this guy will need $1,500 of dental work done. Worth it right?

Congratulations! It’s so important to keep remembering that when someone is acting like that, it’s not about you - it’s completely about them, their perceived failures or whatever, and trying to live through you. You get to be the boss of your own life! How great is that? Keep up the great work!

On Tuesday, my doggy soulmate Buster was diagnosed with IVDD, a degenerative spinal disease. It’s not a death sentence, thank god, and many dogs live for years with the right treatment and care. But it’s still very serious. He’s on bed rest for two weeks, and after that we’ll have to be careful with any kind of rough…

i did a bunch of online shopping today. i hate shopping in person. i some nice sweaters at old navy and also got my husband some things. and then! i bought these amazing sam edelman loafers! got them in black. so excited. what have you bought recently??

Y’ALL it’s been vacation week! Here’s my husband and daughter way up in the sky over the Gulf of Mexico: