Anyway, Nanjiani’s post-juicing face freaks me out.

the biggest fear on the other side is ‘What if this is my last chance?’

Vin Diesel

I miss the non-dehydrated Wolverine from the first two X-Men movies.

I mean, isn't that just the original ending of Fatal Attraction?

That vintage Philussy got you shook.

I was like “Yeah, his hair looks stupid, but it was the ‘80s” and then I got to the part that says it's a modern remake and now I have to lie down. Look how they massacred my boy!

It caught on five years ago. You just had to be young and/or gay to notice. 

He looks a lot like Philip in his youth to me.

Same, but with the Babadook:

I used to see Love Shack on Pop-Up Video a lot as a kid, but I don’t think I really appreciated her vocals until I happened to hear Roam somewhere, which resulted in me becoming a big fan and the most annoying 12-year-old that summer as I told anyone who would listen absolutely everything I had learned about the…

At the time, I though Mariah Carey looked ridiculous as Eminem in the Obsessed music video*, but he really does look like that with facial hair. It looks like bad costume beard; just terrible.

Meanwhile, there’s also a 2018 academic paper cited, with the innocuous title “A corpus study of phonological factors in novel English blends.”

Is scamming the elderly worse than stealing from the surviving family members of plane crash victims, though? She’s arguably not even the worst person on Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, since they did have a cast member who is a religious cult leader bankrupting her parishioners...

back in his wrestling and Rundown days

He writes all his lines for Sarah Michelle Gellar-as-Buffy, but like... it would’ve been a dumb fucking line on that show too.

I’m in the same camp as your son, but I have been blessed in that my only (known) food allergy is cashews, which I only discovered because I was forced to eat them by an aunt who insisted that “They smell weird” was not a good enough reason to say I didn’t like them without ever having tried them. Take that, Auntie…

Me when I hear a celebrity talking about their exciting new booze venture:

Apparently it took my cousin repeatedly complaining about how pineapple was so delicious but it sucked that it made your lips and tongue itch and swell every time you ate it before his parents realized.