Armando Criscione

3/26/19

It just so happens that “Amid Bottles & Sandals” is also the name of Jimmy Buffett’s 2019 Summer Tour.

3/15/19

I’d like to switch my wake word from “Alexa” to “Rosie” and I make her refer to me as “Mr. J.”

3/14/19

It’s ironic that they gave this platform such a hopeful and promising name: “Vita”... but then saddled it was a terminal disease: “proprietary memory cards."

3/8/19

I should want to cook her a simple meal... but I shouldn’t want to cut into her, to tear the flesh, to wear the flesh, to be born unto new worlds where her flesh becomes my key.

3/6/19

This is some Pulitzer-Ass journalism.

3/6/19

I, too, also had a “wait, is that a good thing?” reaction to that title. In hindsight, I now see that AAA-Ass is more akin to “bad-ass” and not other suffix-usage of “ass” such as “weak-ass.” Regardless, I’m just glad to hear that this game doesn’t suck ass.

2/22/19

So THAT’S how Kraft makes their famous “Liquid Gold.”

2/22/19

This should make for some interesting discussions during the upcoming WH visit.

“So... Donny, how would one, hypothetically speaking of course, make video evidence of an utterly repulsive and vomit-inducing sex act just disappear?”

2/8/19

“...I wonder how many more cottonballs I can hide in my mouth...”

2/5/19

Death is hardly a laughing matter. So, I am commenting here to pay my respects to that joke - it died a horrible death. (Also, SHE wasn’t a true Dodger)

2/1/19

That Steve Irwin one is straight-up wrong.

1/29/19

Why are people getting so Huffy about this this? He’s just Mongoose’d her with his trademark “SCHWINN!” pose.

1/27/19

This is especially true considering how, um... “digitally challenged” he is:

1/17/19

This death was a crushing blow to the sport. Truly heartbreaking.

12/21/18

Stephen A. Smith added, “Let’s just hope that Heath Ledger, Amy Winehouse and Chris Farley all get the help they need against the respective battles.”

12/19/18