Minnesota gave us the Replacements and MST3K. It stays, goddammit.

Eat these puns, bitch. Edam all.

 Remember the TV show Banshee?

Yep. Raleigh is overrun with Yinzers. Weird.

It’s the only way to store the all-natural (no HFCS or other shit) variety. Salmonella sucks.

Goddamnit, who’s trying to make onion rings around here..

We had a more interesting experience with our daughter. We brought our international adoptee home at the age of seven months. She never heard English until we finally met her.

No, it’s Iron City. (A worse problem than you thought.)

For a while I owned the most useless thing on Earth: an authentic flag of East Germany. It turns out my dear old Dad, while stationed in Berlin in the 60s, climbed a flagpole in Karlshorst, swiped it, and got his ass back to the Western side after the Volkspolizei took a few shots at him.

America has been descending nationally for a good six weeks now.

What is a “meat raffle” ?

Does a field goal with 0:03 left on the clock count as a happy ending?

After reconstructive surgery. No other circumstance out there that I can think of.

No! You wash away nutrients, believe it or not, and you’ll just turn it all into one sticky blob.

It’s not just you. As my tastes evolved from not eating pre-processed shit 24/7, I noticed that the old standbys just sucked. They were nothing like what Inremembered them being at the time.

No, Albert. Write what you must. Get Magary to disagree.

Yep.

I wouldn’t say Van did a 180. I think he was just warning us about moments like this. If Trump has moments where he can play the media like a two-bit fiddle, then we will get eight years of Trumpism.

This. lest we forget, anyone who could get out of the draft during Vietnam did.