It’s true. The IRS wants you to believe it was tax evasion that brought down Capone. Not so. It was the fucking camels.

Unless this asshole got fired for being racist toward a building, that headline needs an “employee” at the end.

Ah yes, the old “default on debt” strategy beloved by shortsighted, white trash idiots everywhere.

China might argue otherwise. Lucky for Trump, the Chinese are lead by competent people who currently see no need to fuck America to death with their massive leverage.

Nothing says, “I want a cool sports car but am an oblivious, chubby middle-aged man who knows exactly nothing about cars” like buying a Mustang.

It’s not as easy as you’d think. Good graphic designers, like most creatives, tend to lean to the left and find working for Fox News to be abhorrent.

This is the weirdest persecution complex.

I’d love there to be a scandal here, but there just isn’t. Here’s how things played out:

Hate to feed into stereotypes of West Virginia, but you don’t get a name like “Menis Ketchum” without several generations of inbreeding somewhere along the line.

The more I hear about Fallout 76, the less I care about Fallout 76.

I guess it’s unanimous then. Even Nazis hate Nazis.

Is that jar of mayonnaise smoking? Splinter can afford better Photoshop talent than this, right?

Did you just discover the internet or something? I’m clearly just trying to make you feel bad and waste your idiot life. But honestly, this feels like punching a kid with Down’s Syndrome.

Aw, look! Somebody’s sad that many, many people called his dumbass ideas out as stupid, naive, and childish!

Again, nah, I’m just apathetic about your existence. Your ideas are so goddamn outside of reality that you’re not worth dealing with beyond mocking your stupid, naive ass. But hey, if you’re a glutton for punishment, I’m happy to continue insulting you.

You’re a liar or a monstrous human being. Either way, you need to fix yourself and start peeing in the shower, weirdo.

Nah. There’s a level of stupidity I will address and correct. You’re way beyond that level, and honestly, I don’t have the time or the will to explain to you why your ideas read like they came from a child with all kinds of idealism and a poor understanding of reality.

Are you 12 years old? Because otherwise your ideas are bewilderingly stupid.

That’s a lot of crazy bullshit floating around in your head.

The difference is that Hitler had actual, tangible successes to celebrate. Trump’s just jacking off over stuff he said because there’s nothing else to cling to.