I told my wife that I’m happy this car is not convenient to us because if it were I would seriously consider its purchase.

That’s not the fuel door. That’s the leech hatch.

David Tracy still has his first Jeep. And always will.

This. I barely come here anymore because of the edgy Liberarian edge lords. 

I think the great shame of io9 merging into Gizmodo is now I have to share the environment with a bunch of disaffected tech bros and Libertarian snotrags.

I still have my old grandfathered-in Unlimited plan from 2008, when I bought my first smartphone (a Blackberry Curve).

Yeah but what happens if you drop a toolbox on those aluminum switches?

Cheers to the Aldi reference. Its the only place I know where I can go for Orange juice and milk and come out with Orange Juice, Milk, a workout suit, car ramps, and a circular saw.

Better get DeMuro on the phone, he’s probably already got a “Doug Score” ready to go.    

A million cries come from the trailer park, as they say in unison

“SAVE US CHEVROLET. SAVE US. DELIVER US FROM OUR RUSTED 3RD GENS AND 305'S. GIVE US A CAR WORTHY OF A NEW MULLET”

Lapid: “Anything but green.”

Yeah...I found this 10,000 on the side of the road. Good thing I picked up that 9,000 dollars. Who knows what you would do if $8,000 went missing. Damn shame about that $7,000.

Officers on scene were unable to determine if the driver was sober, as he refused to speak, exited the vehicle, stood stock still for a second, then fell over. His injuries consisted of a large swelling on the top of his head, and a number of asterisks orbiting his head. Upon inspection of the vehicle, deputies noted…

Eh. Honestly I think it’s gonna be pretty sweet.

Toyota's actually been doing this for quite a while now.

You want a ghost car? Because that is how you get a ghost car.

Let me drop a little lawyer on you:

Q: You’re 70 now?

A: That’s correct

Q: So, we’re to believe you’re a gentle-driving retiree, is that it?

A: Why, yes, sonny, that’s right.

But why?

Lets see... Out of warranty Audi.... Out of warranty performance Audi. Out of warranty performance Audi with questionable legality...

Take it out with you to guarantee going home alone.