This whole affair is just so emblematic of The Problem, isn’t it? You’ve got these gorgeous women with bodies I couldn’t even achieve by selling my soul to the devil, and yet our culture allows this fucking low-rent Pat Sajak motherfucker to feel like he’s entitled to critique their bodies.

Sorry for attacking single mothers when I said I thought this eighty year old working film actress, who said she stole shit cause she didn’t have money ON HER, maybe just forgot her purse at home. Call me Javert.

It might have been squatters.

“And here I thought I’d already HAD the worst possible time at a theater!”

What the actual fuck is that guy trying to say? No, seriously, not in a, “Boy, that guy’s point is bad” way, but in a more literal, “What the actual fuck is that guy trying to say” way.

I think you mean NXTFL.

Good Lord, this like the Dr. Bronner’s soap bottle of suicide notes.

I need white liberals to stop trying to “fix” everyone else’s communities once and for all and go work on their own, because clearly the call is coming from inside the house.

And this ^ is certainly the past of commenting under content aggregation posts that have regularly appeared on The AV Club for fucking ever..

Praise the lord who today hath brought us good Kinja.

I hope the agent enjoys his ten percent off these contracts. And that he does not smoke all the cigs in one day.

This seems like the first time in a while that a Republican has failed to rig something in his favor.

Guys, guys, c’mon. He said “disclaimer.”

I’m married. She’s 32.

Go fuck yourself

Shutting down the Florida recount in the 2000 Presidential election.

Yeah, I’m going to go ahead and speak for all of Canada and say there’s no way we’re taking in a bunch of states that would immediately form a majority of the population.

I’m willing to bet that she weighs the same as a duck

I know the answer is likely incredible level of body control, but I’m going with wizardy.