Yep. His movies are beautiful, but they're all style and no substance- they just pretend REALLY FUCKING HARD to have substance in the guise of being "edgy." I tried too, but decided that life's too short for that kind of annoyance.

I only have an associates in Strumpetry but am enrolled in an online certification program for Tarting about Town with a concentration in Galavanting. I aspire to be a full-fledged Slut and Master Whore one day, adjunct teaching at several schools, spreading cheer and lasciviousness to all who enroll in my classes.…

You just described my life from about 11-18.

• Playing on my phone (duh) while using the toilet

You can tell this is fiction because no one has ever masturbated thinking about Shia LeBeouf.

"Gainsbourg's character begins to cry while having sex with Shia LaBeouf's penis, and then screams, "I CAN'T FEEL ANYTHING. I CAN'T FEEL ANYTHING. I CAN'T FEEL ANYTHING.""

From a former loyal Sonic Youth fan, this one goes right out to you, T. Moore:

Queen of the side eye:

I think I stood up in front of my computer and clapped for that episode. Bless Jon Stewart and bless you for this gif.

Kidnapping: non-consensual baby sitting

Non-consensual assisted suicide.