I’d like to throw Ballast Point Pumpkin Down into the discussion.

Any fan POV C-Roll footage from the hotel rooms?

Not a storm at all.. Just Dan Snyder exhaling after smelling his own fart.

As a Bears fan, my takeaway from this is that I cannot believe Chris Conte is still in the NFL.

* fart noises *

Hopefully he fairs better than the last sports personality to deliver his own eulogy...

“If you have an old Lisfranc ligament that YOU would like to donate to Darren McFadden, please call the Cowboys front office at your earliest convenience”

Pictured: Moses Moreno

You’re all wrong. Ryan was pointing down towards his feet. His lower abdomen is just what he assumes they’ve been hiding under for years.

“give me fuckin’ job”

Man, I hate when teams hold local politicians hostage like this but the Saddledome is a DUMP. Everyone liked to make fun of Nassau Coliseum and it’s many water leaks but I’ve seen people literally use umbrellas in the Saddledome. It rains in the goddamn rafters!

What useful advice could Jameis Winston offer to Patrick Kane?

Which wrestling-related death made you all more sad? Dusty Rhodes or Roddy Piper?

Schlitz... Really loosens up the system and helps the recovery process the next day if you know what I mean. If you don’t, I’m talking about poop. Schlitz really helps me poop out my hangover the next day.

Why does it hurt when I pee?

Why do my farts smell so bad?

“I love this attitude”

Two beers that fall into “anything else”...

Fruit beer rankings:

So who’s going to be the next Ken Shamrock and make a real, full-out WWE jump?