Dude, you just caused riots by vaguely bad-mouthing it. I am currently rioting.

Isn’t High Life technically malt liquor? Not that it's going to stop me from calling it the champagne of beers and laughing as I wander away from my former friends, but it would be nice to know.

I will never be happy with my external genitalia. God/FSM/nothing could have put it in a more protected area.

The eighties were a weird time. Tormund was really into George Michael then.

I wonder what their kick back from vuvuzela sales were.

Dammit, you beat me.

Wield it carefully though. People will swerve out of the way.

You say that like it isn't worth it.

In Baltimore, you can get 24 Natty Bohs for $12. Just sayin'.

WHO'S THE SPOILED ONE NOW? That's right! Twenty-four Shiners for $18. Livin' the life.

This is still my go-to summer beer. You can get a case of it for $18 this time of summer.

If you only go to Kissimee and the tourist areas, you may not see them. They really use big data to coordinate their policing, so they go where the crimes are going to be. Go downtown on a Saturday night when they shut down Orange Ave and you might even get to see them in action. My first month here I watched them…

Yes. The Orlando police use actual nets to catch criminals like Wile E. Coyote.

Think about how classy you would look at a house party with two of these taped to your hands! LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE, KIDS!

I know in Orlando they aren't allowed to give chase to avoid causing the driver to feel like he needs to speed to get away. They just set a net based on his direction. It works exceptionally well actually. Probably better to let him cruise than have him try to speed to get away.

Yeah! I still yell at people with confederate flags...when it's safe to do so. Some of these people are savages.

My grandma and extended family took me and my brother to a Chinese buffet that did a little bit of everything and none of it well. You know the place that’s tucked in the shitty strip mall in your suburb.

My girlfriend and I have a Sunday funday routine that always starts with cartoons. I’m a part of the Toys’r’Us generation so I don't have to grow up.

It was ridiculous that they didn't let anyone into the game. There were so many people downtown watching/listening to the game that there was still an audible "O!" during the national anthem just like usual. What else were all the national guardsmen down there for then? All the fans came out anyway.

The worst part is that now this drunk, obnoxious girl gets off with no charges! Thanks, Officer Pianta. Now we have to deal with another St. Patty's day with her.