The fact that the Lancer isn’t #1 is a problem. I agree with the torque bow though.

I don't see how the lancer isn't number 1. I mean it's a machine gun with a chainsaw on it, that you use to chainsaw people with!

How about a game where unions become so powerful that they suck every cent out of a given city’s various government agencies and private corporations through things like bloated pensions and benefits until all the businesses and government agencies collapse, and then you come in as the emergency manager to help the…

To be fair though the story wasn’t about anus smelling McDs but the small slice of amazing that is fried chicken.

Unless you are tied to this dealer for life you can always bail. I know that sometimes it’s hard to find a guy who’ll deal to you, but trust me, there is always another dealer out there.

What if we bring ramen and only make it later on, when they bring around hot water for tea?

The best free sample I ever got was at a Sam’s Club. I don’t even remember what the hell I went in there for. I am guessing it was for a giant pack of white socks and matching pack of white t-shirts. That’s all I ever seem to buy there. Anyway, unbeknownst to me I had shown up on free sample day. The grocery section…

I used to live in Mexico. The local Costco (I know, I know) used to include 1/2 cigars and tequila shots on sample Saturdays. Made shopping much more enjoyable.

Which bothers you more: starving children or starving animals?

I lived in London for a year from 2000 - 2001. Do not over spend for London. If you’re giving up your entire draft, go all-in for Paris. Better yet, value shop a little, work the phones, and grab Sevilla or San Sebastian on Day Two.

Hey nail-biting guy:

You’re crazy. Why would Ireland trade Dublin for St. Louis? They’d want at least Portland in the deal to even consider it.

Yo, you’re wrong about having to give homeless people paper money. I’ve watched plenty of homeless men in Chicago count out nickels and dimes on the liquor store counter before in order to get a plastic pint bottle of shit vodka to last them the day. Those coins add up quick.

OK Cupid has questions online daters like me (judge away) use to determine compatibility, and there are a number of questions on there that I feel are clear “traps” for determining terrible human beings, which I appreciate. One of the questions is, ‘Which bothers you more: starving children or starving animals?” I…

“I offer the entire list of American heartland cities just to get Paris or London here in the States.”

Re: Slowing down for a police car (or “police car”)

I challenge you to come up with a better “free sample” experience than that.

“plant a hydrogen bomb in the city’s catacombs.”

That cities question is amazing; I’d give anything to live in a world where we could start an international incident by offering Turkey Portland, Memphis, and a city to be named later for Istanbul.

“That was a lot, but it still wasn’t what we were gonna make the game for because we had private investors lined up.”