The person who believes that nothing is 100% certain should just shut up about it. That hypothetical person is just being hurtful to their partner, and christ on a cracker, is being right so frickin' important? Let it go.

Do they all involve da bulls and da bearse?

My husband can't stand loose hairs in the shower or anywhere. It's his big weird gross out. Unfortunately, he married a woman with long hair, and we have a large lab mutt. He's constantly picking up loose hairs and throwing them away. I don't mind since he cleans the drains which I can't even begin to address.

I have very long hair that sheds. I have a mesh drain screen AND I collect hairs while washing/conditioning and stick them to the shower wall.

I'm guilty of that one. All of my impressions of men (not serious impressions, just sort of "repeating something stupid they said") sound like some heavyset guy from Chicago.

Sounds like total bullshit, imo.

I'm not even sure why I do it. I find it oddly soothing.

And YOU are the reason we can't have nice things.

"Sometimes she mocks my velociraptor impression and it makes me really sad because I'm a good velociraptor."

My boyfriend has a hair tolerance of no more than three strands. At three strands he makes a face and washes it down. He doesn't cry because seriously just spray water on it.

Had no issue with these. It was about specific relationships, not "the womins in general". Hence, hilariously specific jewels of complaint like this:

omg I do this with my shower hair too. I always make horses and faces. My boyfriend usually participates.

that hair thing!! That's disgusting and hilarious. Anyway none of these are really female specific. I was expecting more "bitchez be crazy" type stuff.

Awesome article which needed to be written. Thank you.

Oh yeah, some of them are definitely real. I think there's some people showing off their photoshop skills mixed in there. And then, like you pointed out, there's some stuff where I have no idea what's going on.

sounded to me more like you were mad, and I appreciated it. it feels in defense of all of us, and what else is Jezebel for? truly, good job and thanks.

YES. Whether or not these people are famous or even whether or not they were in public has nothing to do with it. If I could overhear that a neighbor was being abused in her own home I would damn well be calling the cops, and anyone who would not do the same should be ashamed of him/herself.

Thank you for writing this, Erin. It took guts.

I just wanted to also chime in that I really liked that line, and as someone who has also been dragged down a hallway by various appendages (and also thought at the time that I should've left before it got worse) that I appreciate your honesty talking about this.

It's hard to realize that the water you're swimming in is poison if you're used to it.

And plenty of folks don't realize that the once-cool water has started boiling until it's already too hot.

Crime behind closed doors is still crime. Abuse in a relationship is still abuse. No one should have to endure it. No one.