I hate to be that guy, but it's JACK Antonoff, and he's actually pretty talented. Even I am shocked I typed that last sentence #notallpopstars

I tried on some nerd's Glass at a bar last week (don't worry, I had permission, calm yoselves) and could not for the life of me figure out how to make it do literally ANYTHING.

Really, your takeaway from this was "high-end maple syrup"?

Chobani's main plant is in Central New York, a region that's been crumbling as manufacturing moves out.

(Non Bar League) Sports Teams

I feel so much better about this now! We are not all crazy actress-author-ladies who can just *naturally* drink a gallon of water in the AM b/c we just "feel like it". NO SHAME.

So I keep a full bottle (and often a half-full glass) of water on my bedside table, yet I NEVER remember that it's there, let alone that I should make it not-full.

I'm going with silver-spray-painted-hot-dog-but-who-cares-because-PENIS-basically

Gaga's "turn glamour into something on the inside" comment is a really interesting counterpoint to this article currently up on Paleofuture/Giz right now. The author of the book "The Power of Glamour" discusses the concept that is STRICTLY external and somewhat superficial to a degree.

I didn't know I had an alternative if I wanted both emoji and group texting. Is there a better way? I would ditch GoSMS in a HEARTBEAT, especially since the majority of their error/settings messages are in broken English that I can't understand.

Google Images FTW again! People always ask me where I get my compendium of GIFS from, and I refuse to tell anyone that my source is literally just "Google".

Oh my sweet Velveeta Jesus, where is this GIF from?

Brussels Sprouts: You thought girls were gross once, too.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DOES IT HAVE EMOJI?

This is GENIUS.

This might be a little old-school but I'm going as Sydney Bristow from Alias this year. All i had to buy was the red wig, and then i'm wearing black tight pants, a black long sleeve shirt, and kick-ass boots. Small dab of lipstick on the side for added "blood" effect. Kick ass, comfy, and a tribute to one of the…

I watched the pilot, and even though I thought it was good, I can't watch it because of one teeny issue:

If you listen all the way to 3:14, he actually states, "need you riding me". So much for innuendo.

GOP stands for Greyhairyteeth Old Party forever, now.

Sometimes I'm really sad that I actually bother to read to the bottom of the comments, because people come in and say what I was going to only way more clearly and awesomely.