Meh.

I mean, what even is that?

I mean, could you imagine? I’m sure standing next to a single supermodel would make me feel pretty terrible, but standing next to like half a dozen? FUCK NOPE.

I actually saw her recently walking around Tribeca. She really truly didn’t look bad at all. Granted, she wasn’t dressed up, where I feel like she struggles the most. She was just in jeans and a T shirt and she really looked pretty great. Also, she totally didn’t look overweight. I’m now a firm believer that she’s…

Hey Diane, do you even like child molesters?

I’ve literally never thought of it like that. But from now on i’m going to get an extra spring in my step the next time I go to my neighborhood pube.

Pubes?

I feel like I love you more and more each day

It’s a good thing my slutty self has never vacationed in Morocco. My hatred of intense heat and love of skimpy, sorceress (I have naked sorcery) clothing would def put me in jail there, apparently.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is running for president.

May the BritBrit be with you

Right?! Like fuck you Egyptian prank show douchebags for making me side with Paris Hilton.

STFU, Kirstie

YESSSS! Mr. DancingMuppets is all for it as long as i wear a crop top underneath my sexiness barrier.

That’s so fucking brilliant. I’ve never thought of it that way.

That wold have been a way better reaction that what actually happened.

hahahahahhaha! I feel you, kid. I sadly love their chicken too.

Well, that’s all I needed for the push. I’m going shopping tmrw.

You know, every time I buy a new pair my internal monologue is like “do you really need another pair esp at your age?” and then I’m all “fuck it, it’s not like you’re trying to pull off overalls or anything”